I dedicate this post to all the gorgeous Mama’s out there. Because we are awesome. Our bodies create little people and our new Mummy bodies should be celebrated no matter what shape or size we become. Our bodies will never be the same as they were prior to having children but that’s ok. We are warriors. We have sacrificed ourselves for the miracle that is child bearing and we should embrace our new body with pride.
We all know that having children drastically changes us physically and emotionally. I lovingly call my body The Geriatric Hulkinator Mummy Body. All those in the Mummy club are well versed with all the fantastic (NOT!) changes in our bodies which are considered “normal” during and after giving birth. For example:
Now I’m all for wearing your tiger stripes with pride because face it – we are pretty freaking awesome for creating a human being in our fantastical bodies! But I do have one complaint about these silver/red/purple lines – oh sweet baby jeebus they are so damn itchy when they are forming!!
Well this one makes a lot of sense, with all those hormones flying around during and after pregnancy it’s bound to affect our little bodies somehow – but geez they can really punch you in the proverbial gonads! Mood swings, emotional outbursts, baby brain (yes it’s a thing!), hair falling out, hair growing in weird places (so I’ve heard…), pimples, sensitive skin, excessive sweating…I mean if popping a freaking human out of our hoohah wasn’t enough, we also have to go through months of feeling like an alien in our own bodies!
Oh the night sweats! Pre-babies I hardly ever sweat. I could go cray cray at the gym and you would not see one bead of sweat on my forehead. But after having kids – the night sweats are freaking ridiculous! I was so concerned I went to the Doctor and asked him WTF was happening to me! I got the “Oh that is quite normal” speech. Ummm no buddy – it’s not freaking normal to wake up with a start because you feel like you are on fire and could quite possibly fill an Olympic pool with your night sweats! Ok slight exaggeration – but if those night sweats are anything to go buy, I am reallllly not looking forward to menopause!
This one sucks big time. I’ve always had sensitive skin and had to be careful about what products I use on my body, but after having kids I’m lucky I’m not allergic to water! With each pregnancy my skin allergies have gotten worse and I am now unable to use most makeup/beauty products, have to be really careful what body washes and shampoos I use otherwise I end up blowing up like the Hulk! I must now walk this earth make up free and scaring the bejesus out of my fellow man.
And those laser/waxing/hair colouring/nail appointments I religiously put myself through prior to having children are a thing of the past. They all bring on my inner Hulk and that’s scarier than my Zombie Makeup Free self!
I heard that after giving birth Mama’s experience ‘a little’ hair loss which was nothing to worry about. Pfftt. What absolute hog wash! After my first pregnancy I was rocking THE SEXIEST bald patches. I looked like a balding baby bird. I lost about 70% of my hair. I was rocking a comb over. Enough said.
Then there were the not so normal physical changes that occurred that were the final touches of my transformation from late 20’s to geriatric.
Anyone else ended up with this after pregnancy? Those who have experienced it know that it is a tad painful, can limit movement at times and sometimes it’s bad enough that you have to give up your dream of being a marathon runner (not that I could run before the Sacroiliitis).
So after two babies and 5 years of motherhood my Mummy Body is a far cry from what it used it be. I’m a limping, pleasantly plump, squishy, balding baby bird who on occasion turns into the Hulk when vanity wins and I stupidly apply some mascara, and sometimes I feel like I’m 80 (especially when my 5 month old can move faster than I can).
BUT it is all so worth it. I may have come out of it scarred and slightly wounded, but I am damn proud that despite being told I most likely would never have children, I brought two healthy baby boys into this world. So what if I’m a little squishy – my boys find comfort and safety in my squishy pillowy embrace. Who cares if I limp in pain after a day out with my family – at least I can still move around enough to enjoy my boys.
I’m not going to lie, there are times I miss my pre-baby body, but then I realise that what I used to worry about then doesn’t bother me anymore. I find strength in the fact that I now know what my body is capable of, it’s strength, it’s reliability, it’s courage. I’m proud of my Geriatric Hulkinator Mummy Body.
What are you most proud of?